Kitten Heels

I told you one of my biggest fears was my mum finding my toys. Today I figured the best way to lower the risk of that actually happening would be to lower the number I actually had.

So I visited my secret stash and tested and assessed each and every one of my toys and decided which I was going to throw out. I’d actually forgotten about some that were in there. I can’t believe how many don’t even work anymore.

On the ‘to go’ pile is a pink rabbit, a purple dildo, a small ‘life-like’ cock vibe plus a clit kit. Don’t forget the silver anal probey thing and the red finger vibe. Those I just don’t use much anymore.

I have left one blue rabbit, one green nymph vibe, a sliver jelly dildo, a purple ribbed vibe, a blue multi-pulsing vibe (divine) and a knicker critter (so far unused). This is without ‘additions’ that I wouldn’t use on my own.

Now I’m faced with a problem. I have made these two lists. But how does one dispose of sex toys? I’ve never done it and I’m a little worried about just dumping them in the rubbish. What if the bag opens just as the bag is chucked in the rubbish van at the same time some little old lady and a group of school kids are walking past? Also, are they recyclable? Nope, not a good idea.

Then I’m thinking to myself that I don’t even want to get rid of them. They hold memories. One of them is my first ever sex toy. Another is the first The Bloke Indoors ever used on me. Then there are the two of them that were used at the same time while I sucked him. No, I don’t think I even want to get rid of them.

Maybe I should just buy a safe for the lot and put it in my wardrobe so that only I can get to them?